This man needs serious help but he just quintuples down on every bad decision because he is incapable of knowledge, wisdom, humility, and shame. What a sad existence.
I'm convinced this is how he chooses to live. I've followed his charm offensive vs. a loose association of former Opie and Anthony listeners and legions of lolcow spotters for a few years now and have seen no reason to believe he'll ever change. Somehow demanding real life consequences for online shenanigans was more important than making more of the many opportunities he's enjoyed.
I've followed this whole thing out of a sense of "Wow, so *there's* a trainwreck...", and haven't been able to really stop myself from watching it all.
About all I can say at this point? It's a wreck, there are a bunch of trains, and it is something you just can't not watch, no matter how bad you feel about it.
That said... Mr. Tomlinson's behavior exhibits a lot of congruent features I've observed with family members and acquaintances who've been (or, should have been...) clinically diagnosed with personality disorders. The one that strikes me as being most like Mr. Tomlinson was someone whose headshrinker described as being "...a reverse malign narcissist, someone who self-sabotages and does destructive things in order to play victim..."
That individual was just unable to be happy, unless they were persecuted and could make themselves feel as though they were being victimized. By everyone. Quite often, they would do things much like what Mr. Tomlinson has done, and they'd actively display pleasure at the "proof" that they were the victims... It's a weird deal, sort of like being your own Munchausen's by Proxy abuser. You feel like you're watching them punch themselves in the face, while they're screaming "STOP HITTING ME!!!! STOP! DON'T HIT ME!!!", and you're just going "You're doing this to yourself, you're the only one who can stop..."
And, of course, since they're getting the endorphin hits off being the victim, they simply cannot stop. Ever.
I think this behavior is somewhat learned; they find that being abused gives them a weird sort of emotional "hit", so they constantly set up situations so that they'll be abused. I've watched this same sort of weird behavior in some abused women, who serially seek out exactly the same sort of abusive partner, in relationship after relationship. It's disturbing and bizarre; you help them pull out of the situation, and then... They go right back into something exactly the same, like horses running back into a burning barn. After a couple of iterations, you're left there on the sidelines wondering if the abuse wasn't the damn point, all along...
Like a lot of behaviors, all of this has its roots in the endorphin cascade triggered by certain behaviors. They get the wrong pattern set up early in life, and not understanding how those channels got laid down, or that they're even there...? They keep right on doing what got them that initial hit, no matter what it was.
It's sort of like that deal with the schizophrenic chick who murdered her mother and sister; after they caught her, they asked for an explanation, a motive. Hers was pretty simple: Her grandmother died, and at the funeral, she met a guy. Afterwards, she wanted to see him again, and so she murdered her mother and sister, thinking he'd come to their funerals...
I'd suggest that something like this might be at the deepest, darkest roots of why Mr. Tomlinson does what he does. The man is more to be pitied than anything else...
Well he responded to me with his enjoy prison tic🤣 I swatted him pointing where I live American simply don't apply. Then reminded him to finish the novels he owes his readers. Haven't heard back.
These are your delusions, child. The FBI knows I didn’t pay Quasi. They know you did. You will be held immobilized until the police arrive to arrest you for your many felony Substacks. Enjoy prison, stalker.
*chef’s kiss* Perfection.
This man needs serious help but he just quintuples down on every bad decision because he is incapable of knowledge, wisdom, humility, and shame. What a sad existence.
I'm convinced this is how he chooses to live. I've followed his charm offensive vs. a loose association of former Opie and Anthony listeners and legions of lolcow spotters for a few years now and have seen no reason to believe he'll ever change. Somehow demanding real life consequences for online shenanigans was more important than making more of the many opportunities he's enjoyed.
I'm so sorry, Pat.
I've followed this whole thing out of a sense of "Wow, so *there's* a trainwreck...", and haven't been able to really stop myself from watching it all.
About all I can say at this point? It's a wreck, there are a bunch of trains, and it is something you just can't not watch, no matter how bad you feel about it.
That said... Mr. Tomlinson's behavior exhibits a lot of congruent features I've observed with family members and acquaintances who've been (or, should have been...) clinically diagnosed with personality disorders. The one that strikes me as being most like Mr. Tomlinson was someone whose headshrinker described as being "...a reverse malign narcissist, someone who self-sabotages and does destructive things in order to play victim..."
That individual was just unable to be happy, unless they were persecuted and could make themselves feel as though they were being victimized. By everyone. Quite often, they would do things much like what Mr. Tomlinson has done, and they'd actively display pleasure at the "proof" that they were the victims... It's a weird deal, sort of like being your own Munchausen's by Proxy abuser. You feel like you're watching them punch themselves in the face, while they're screaming "STOP HITTING ME!!!! STOP! DON'T HIT ME!!!", and you're just going "You're doing this to yourself, you're the only one who can stop..."
And, of course, since they're getting the endorphin hits off being the victim, they simply cannot stop. Ever.
I think this behavior is somewhat learned; they find that being abused gives them a weird sort of emotional "hit", so they constantly set up situations so that they'll be abused. I've watched this same sort of weird behavior in some abused women, who serially seek out exactly the same sort of abusive partner, in relationship after relationship. It's disturbing and bizarre; you help them pull out of the situation, and then... They go right back into something exactly the same, like horses running back into a burning barn. After a couple of iterations, you're left there on the sidelines wondering if the abuse wasn't the damn point, all along...
Like a lot of behaviors, all of this has its roots in the endorphin cascade triggered by certain behaviors. They get the wrong pattern set up early in life, and not understanding how those channels got laid down, or that they're even there...? They keep right on doing what got them that initial hit, no matter what it was.
It's sort of like that deal with the schizophrenic chick who murdered her mother and sister; after they caught her, they asked for an explanation, a motive. Hers was pretty simple: Her grandmother died, and at the funeral, she met a guy. Afterwards, she wanted to see him again, and so she murdered her mother and sister, thinking he'd come to their funerals...
I'd suggest that something like this might be at the deepest, darkest roots of why Mr. Tomlinson does what he does. The man is more to be pitied than anything else...
Well he responded to me with his enjoy prison tic🤣 I swatted him pointing where I live American simply don't apply. Then reminded him to finish the novels he owes his readers. Haven't heard back.
These are your delusions, child. The FBI knows I didn’t pay Quasi. They know you did. You will be held immobilized until the police arrive to arrest you for your many felony Substacks. Enjoy prison, stalker.